Thursday, July 31, 2003
Made it out of Alice (thank the lord, the "red centre" has a relative paucity of red meat). Surfers is dull. What I need is to broaden my horizons. To take on the world....
Monday, July 28, 2003
Still waiting to hitch a lift out of Alice. Should be able to smuggle myself out in a meat convoy tomorrow.
Sunday, July 27, 2003
Fluffkins wrote to me saying I'm a father! Of course, she can't prove they're mine but I'm pleased to read in the paper there has been an increase in unexplained toddler abductions in the Gold Coast area. They're names are Dash Slash (-/) and Shriek Slash (!/)
Hitched my way down to Alice Springs in a backpacker bus - got a bit constipated with all the tinned meat so went for a run. Was nearly killed by a campervan which HURTLED towards me near Ayres rock. It smelt a bit meaty so I've stalked it the 4hours back to Alice springs and am preparing to move in for the kill.
Monday, July 21, 2003
Although a fight between a saltwater croc, a great white and a grizzly is one I'd still pay good money to see.
Sunday, July 20, 2003
I was in this pub, right, and in walks a shark. And a 'saltie' croc. And we all had a few too many and there was a big fight.....
Who's the King of the beasts now Simba??
Who's the King of the beasts now Simba??
Baby's arm. Fnaar.
Friday, July 18, 2003
Grew tired of the superficialitiness of Surfers and The Coast, so I've moved up north to the wilds of the NT to rediscover my inner feral killer.
Bit a baby's arm off but couldn't finish the job.
But it will come.
Oh yes.
Bit a baby's arm off but couldn't finish the job.
But it will come.
Oh yes.
Saturday, July 12, 2003
If you recieve a call from a Poodle who wants my address you NEVER KNEW ME. They can't be my puppies anyway.....
Saturday, July 05, 2003
Tried the Atkins diet but couldn't cope with the excess cheese. Back on the Crown Lager and Nobby's Nuts.
Friday, July 04, 2003
Mmmm. I love the taste of a Japenese tourist after a night on the town. Even an English backpacker slips down a treat after a few schooners of the brown stuff.
Unfortunately all these rich pickings combined with the reduced need to dodge speeding 4X4 Jeep Wranglers is playing havoc with my lean predator profile. Thinking of trying the Atkins diet.
Unfortunately all these rich pickings combined with the reduced need to dodge speeding 4X4 Jeep Wranglers is playing havoc with my lean predator profile. Thinking of trying the Atkins diet.
